I really appreciate the long ramble. I fully appreciate the amount of introspection needed. In many ways, you can’t unhear just like you can’t unsee. This is, I think, an inherently human characteristic, and it’s not only audio. Back it 2018 I posted this on fonts and typography, which makes the same point. I didn’t have audio references for what I was trying to say.
You also repeat that “endgame is a myth” but perhaps end-budget is not so much a myth. It’s funny, looking back how I went through a phase where a Headroom Airhead and Sennheiser HD-580s were very satisfying. My reference headphones, the old STAX, were not being used so much due to some changes in how I had my stereo system set up, and I liked the freedom of a CD Walkman type arrangement with the Airhead (powered by 3 AAA batteries) and the Senn.
I always tried to go to enough live music that I appreciated the difference between a live performance and a recording. Maybe that’s what kept me happy - knowing that all audio was just a compromise, and being OK with the compromise as I had it.
Again, thank you.